Poppy

How can such a little fluff ball fill such a big space?
Quickly letting us know she was pivotal to our world.

She never asks for much – a warm spot, high five and a fuss.
But she some how filled my heart with those beautiful eyes & gentle soul.

Yet my beautiful one.. you have a battle ahead of you no one should have
Fighting to live, play, snooze, eat, cuddle & be so loved.

You watch the birdies outside, unaware of the battle that wages inside you.
I send you healing my beautiful one, hoping it can somehow stop the war.

I need to tell you how much I love you & how you’ve brought such joy.
Whether we beat this cancer or not, thank you sweet Poppy.

I was given such a precious gift when you came my way that summers day.
I’m beyond blessed to share your time and I love you so… thank you xx

Jack..

Life is one big, long on-going blur
Everything goes past us so quickly

We vow to do more and to feel more
But do we ever really open that door

In our darker moments we make the pledge
But the mundane of life puts us back in the box

Back in the lemming box of normality and ritual
Hoping our inner Jack will pop out of the box

To really live, love, laugh, talk, bare souls, watch the stars
I don’t want to be Jack in the box

I want to be Jack out the box….
Come on… it’s just a lid at the end of the day…20151001_183810.jpg

We digress..

At one with the within

Out but not without

A journey of searching

A litteny of salty errors

Tears that flow down cheeks

No where for them to go

Smile for that camera

Simply must have that bag

What is this life we lead

If full of things we don’t need

Running from the here and now

Finding another empty place ahead 

We digress from ourselves

We enter the battleground of life

Sit back, step within yourself 

The smiles are free, the peace easy…

My old friend…

I love the long, warm days of summer.
The extra sunshine that makes more of my day.

I moan when the season starts to change.
When I wake up cold and pull on an extra cover.

At the same time knowing I love the change.
Love the melancholic drifting of wood smoke.

Love the beautiful colours against crisp sunlight.
The kicking of leaves on a long, rambling walk.

Hot drinks and cosy nights start to draw in.
This season is the one that heralds it’s arrival.

That shouts with fiery glory that it’s here.
Yes, I like the summer warmth for sure.

But I think I love Autumn maybe even more.
Welcome once again my old, beautiful friend

Missing you.. 

The older I get the more I miss them. .

I mean I really do miss them more and more.

I’m reaching older years so what’s that all about? 

My loss seems more tangible than ever. I feel it deep in my soul just lately.
Is it because as I age I feel each day is a step closer to seeing them again?

I don’t know but I do know time is letting me realise how much I was loved and how lucky I was.

I so wish I could go back in time and savour all those moments I just took for granted as a child. 

Be able to say thank you with a true understanding of what I am receiving and the thought and love behind it all.

But I can’t. . I can only remember now and hope they know my eternal gratitude and love.

Thank you mum and dad, I hit the jackpot with you both. I miss you more than you’ll ever know xx 

Relax.. 

It’s ok to be a little lost in life.

Its ok to wonder where you’re going. 

For with this sense of not knowing comes the inner knowledge of your journey. 

Feeling lost means you are finding your true yourself.

Wondering where you’re going means you are finding your true path. 

It’s all as it should be….. so relax, take in the ‘lost’ and the ‘where’ as friends. 

Ones that are simply adjusting your life’s sails..

Always…

Catherinewheels, scattering sparkles of ‘Ooh’ and ‘aww’ into the darkness.

Golden flashes of retinal burns scatter across ever childish eyes.

Can she remember the Catherinewheel when her hand was in mine I wonder.

A time when the darkness could not contain all the happiness that I knew.

Stripped bare of her company the wheel spins an endless tale of my broken heart.

The memories of her beauty and laughter forever reflected in my son’s innocent eyes.  

My darling Catherine, my eternal love.

I close my eyes and hear her quietly whisper to me.

‘I remember my love, I will always remember’ xx